I am proposing a new Make A Wish foundation. It works this way… Any time I wish for anything, someone from the foundation shows up and takes care of things. I can’t see a downside.

The climate change deniers organization is building a waterproof center so they can continue to deny climate change while under water.

I don’t like it that everyone is unique and special. I can’t get away with using my standard responses.

I got really angry looking for something to drink with. Turns out that was the last straw.