It’s hard to believe that the culmination of millions of years of evolution is that driver that just cut me off.

I much prefer our superstition to their superstition. Yes I know they are equally baseless, but ours gives my life meaning, and it brings me good luck.

The dealer called to tell me that my time machine is going to break down tomorrow. Bummer, now I have to go back to yesterday and renew the warranty.

In my ongoing attempt to become a game changer, I took our chess set and put it in the freezer.